NELLIE LOVETT: Owner's Guide and Manual
by Frozenonthesea
Summary: Ever dreamed about having a NELLIE LOVETT unit?, well you can now. Here's the Guide and Manual.


**Disclaimer: Ok I have a question for you; do you think I own Sweeney Todd? Answer me this when you review. (But no I don't, but still answer please. Mainly because I am in a random mood right now.)**

**A/N: This is the second in the series of units. I will make more on request, but seeing as this unit was requested so much more(actually that was this was the only one requested) , I had to make this one first. Also no flames or hate mail for me calling Albert a jackass, Nellie a bitch(Mostly just because it fit better then any other words), and, Lucy a bitch, but, she deserves it!. The person who wrote this in ATLA fics is Ratraccoon. I don't take credit for the ideas of units. I made these though with my own inspiration, because nobody had done them in Sweeney Todd.**

**Other Units: SWEENEY TODD.**

On December 2, 2005 we discontinued our (NELLIE) LOVETT units. Because of this we ran out of new NELLIE units several months later so now we only have used NELLIE units available for sale. This manual is a reprint with answers to questions about used NELLIE units in general added and information on where your NELLIE unit came from.

This NELLIE unit is in very good condition because the former owner only had 2 years of use, and the only reason why she returned her was because she became bor…err… wanted a SWEENEY unit and couldn't afford to have both and had to choose which unit she would prefer to have.

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**NELLIE LOVETT: Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual**

Congratulations! You are now the proud owners of a u…err…certified illegally created pre-owned, fully automated NELLIE unit. To ensure you get the full benefits of your Loving, Motherly, Bitch, and Baker. Please pay close attention to the following instructions.

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**Basic Information:**

Name: (NELLIE) LOVETT

Date of Manufacture: 35 years ago

Place of Manufacture: Unknown

Nationality/Ethnicity: London? (We don't know)

Height: About 5'9"

Weight: She refuses to take off her mass of hair that, she can't take off, but refuses to let be cut and we can't even tell if it is heavy or light weight and would obstruct with getting an accurate measurement.

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**Your NELLIE unit will come with the following accessories:**

One (1) Make up bag (Full of all black, dark colours)

One (1) Meat Pie

Three (3) Black dresses

One (1) Black arm netting

One (1) Swim-suit (the one from where she's sing By the Sea)

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**Programming:**

Your NELLIE unit is not much of a versatile unit but is still very useful none the less.

**Dead:** (Default Program) NELLIE units are a part of TOBY unit's lives from almost immediately after being made and may have to give their lives up for TOBY units if they were to die from SWEENEY units. So basically NELLIE units are meant to die. (But this can be by passed)

**Baker: **(Default Program) NELLIE units, are naturally set to be bakers, because of upholding their families wishes, and, not living the life they dreamed. Blah blah blah, yada yada yada.

**Apparition:** Once your NELLIE unit leaves the realm of the living she will appear as an apparition no doubt during a hallucination in most cases.

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**Your NELLIE unit has six (6) settings:**

**Responsibility:** (Default Setting) All NELLIE units have a very strong sense of responsibility and will do anything and we really mean anything that is good for everyone else even if she hates it.

**Amused: **Typically caused by SWEENEY units both intentionally and unintentionally.

**Happy:** Often simultaneously with amused, her happy setting will activate if she is enjoying herself.

**Sad/Depressed:** Usually when it comes to duties that suck for her.

**Angry: **(Level 1 Lock) Caused by case of a NELLIE unit fighting a LUCY unit, and LUCY unit wins.

**Jealousy:** Will cause your NELLIE unit to get into a catfight with a LUCY unit.

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**Relations with other units:**

Your NELLIE unit is a somewhat friendly unit and is compatible with just about any other unit when she first meets them.

**LUCY BARKER:** This is the unit that is least compatible. She is the bitch who ruined everything by coming to Sweeney Todd at the end of the movie. So if you want her to ruin things between NELLIE unit, and, SWEENEY unit be my guest, but, I have one wish! (Burn in hell!)

**TOBY: **This is where a mother/son relation comes in. TOBY units are easily able to win the heart of NELLIE units, because he is a sweet, poor boy.

**SWEENEY TODD: **Will be love at first sight; however it's not meant to be, as your NELLIE unit is destined to die (though this can be by passed!). This is why SWEENEY units are so defensive of NELLIE units.

**ALBERT LOVETT: **This is the jackass that your NELLIE unit is married to; hopefully he will get killed off by SWEENEY unit before anything gross could happen.

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**Cleaning:**

Your NELLIE unit is fully capable of cleaning herself. But if you wish to do it yourself do not machine wash, do not tumble dry, and do not hang on the line to dry.

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**Energy:**

Since she cooks, for herself, (even cough if it isn't edible) she eats. Though it's best that if you're a cook, that you do the cooking, and, force her to eat something other then burnt, disgusting, crusty, meat pies.

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**Frequently Asked Questions:**

Q: Is having an ALBERT unit near my NELLIE unit a good or bad thing?

A: It's bad; on one hand the presence of a ALBERT unit will make her un-happy, and, possibly get her killed; but on the other hand it will increase her chance of having a SWEENEY TODD unit so jealous that he will kill the EDWARD unit.(IT IS NOT RECOMMENDED!, Do this at YOUR own! RISK!)

Q: My NELLIE unit is sacrificing herself for a TOBY unit and it's not even mine! Why is it that I can't convince her not to do it?

A: Unfortunately her responsibility setting is so powerful that once she is set on doing what is right, and motherly nothing can stop her.

Q: Can I still get spare parts and accessories for my NELLIE unit?

A: Even though we discontinued our NELLIE units we will still make spare parts and accessories for her until July 15, 2009 (we pulled back the spare part discontinuation date back a whole year do to her unexpected popularity). After that once we run out of new parts in storage you will have to get used parts that have been cannibalized from other NELLIE units or get custom-made parts from either us or your nearest auto body shop.

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**Troubleshooting:**

Problem: You don't like having an ALBERT unit around your NELLIE unit and would like to get rid of him.

Solution: Tell him that an NELLIE unit has a special mission for him and is willing to allow certain things to be done. Next pick out which suicide mission for him to do or at the very least, one he is not too likely to survive if he screws up. Missions that will somehow involve (SWEENEY) TODD units are usually the best ones.

Problem: Your NELLIE unit has sacrificed herself for a TOBY unit and you don't know what to do to get her to appear.

Solution: Your NELLIE unit is still functional just not in the way that you are use to; she now only appears as an apparition. There are three different ways to get her appear. 1. The best one and the only one that won't be caused by some kind of hallucination is to go to the Fleet Street where apparitions are very common. 2. Is the drug hallucination, quite often involving drinking poison. 3. Is the way where you force yourself to suffer from eating meat pies, until you complain enough for her to come out.

**CAUTION:** If you are not the type person who would go to those lengths then you are crazy for buying an illegal…pre-owned NELLIE unit.

**WARNING:** We are in no way responsible if you go into Fleet Street and contract malaria, or die from eating a meat pie.

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With proper care and maintenance you and you NELLIE unit should get along just fine.

**WARNING:** If you and your NELLIE unit wish to get along keep all LUCY units away and get a SWEENEY unit. It is not recommended to not have a SWEENEY unit, unless…err….you wish to, be made into a meat pie.


End file.
